Maintaining relationships is hard and breakups are even more difficult; moving on from broken relationships is even harder. Have you had a breakup and are wondering how to make your ex-boyfriend want you back?
Regardless of the reason for your breakup, the aftermath is almost always dreadful. From sadness and loneliness to despair and confusion, you are bound to go through a turmoil of emotions. But before we get into making your ex want you again, you should step back and assess your situation thoroughly so that you don’t end up regretting your decision again.
Do You Want Your Ex-Boyfriend Back?
If you dreamt of a life together with your boyfriend, a breakup is bound to be painful, challenging, and a hard slap back to reality. It can distort your rational thinking, reasoning, and functioning capabilities. But it need not remain that way. There’s always a way to get back together, given both of you want it to work.
Reconciling with an ex-boyfriend is nothing new or remarkable. But some couples ruin their chances of getting back together due to their bad, post-breakup behavior. The one thing you need to be clear about is if you actually want to get back together and if the efforts to be with him again are truly going to be worth it or not.
Is It a Good or Bad Idea?
This is an objective question; to each their own. Whether it is a good idea to re-invest in a relationship that once proved wrong is totally up to you to decide. It all depends on your reasons and motives.
Sometimes, the urge to get back together can turn out to be temporary, especially if your boyfriend was the one who initiated the breakup. This can make you reanalyze all your past actions, and you may begin to feel that things could have been different had your behavior been different.
So if you’re wondering if you really want to be his girlfriend again, there are some hard questions you must ask yourself.
Are You Really Missing Him or Are You Just Lonely?
It’s not easy to get over a breakup, but before considering getting back with your ex, ask yourself if it’s something you actually want. Do you really miss him or are you just lonely? Don’t try to get back only because you can’t stand being alone and single again. Learn to love your company and invest in your hobbies and interests.
When you were still together, you would have understandably spent a large part of your time with each other. This may have made you drift away from your other friends. So take some time for yourself, spend time with your friends, and genuinely try to be happy.
But despite your attempts to move on, if you still feel that the breakup was a mistake, you must not leave any stone unturned in getting back together.
Why Do You Want to Go Back to Your Boyfriend?
After a breakup, in a fit of nostalgia, people tend to glaze over the difficult patches of their relationship and only focus on the happy moments. This can make them want to rush into reconciling again. If you’re doing this, it’s time to remove your rose-tinted glasses and look at the situation with a rational, practical mind.
If you’re thinking of getting back together even after being aware of the possible pitfalls, remember to start on the right note. Think of the reasons why you want to get back together again. And if you find that your motives are honest and practical, then go ahead. Else, one of you is bound to get hurt again.
Why Did You Break Up?
This is a very crucial matter to consider. Remember the reason why you broke up in the first place. Is the problem fixable? Whose fault was it? If it was yours, are you ready to put in the effort to amend them?
If your boyfriend was at fault, are you sure he wouldn’t repeat those actions? Are you both ready to mend bridges and start on a fresh note? Will you be able to put your past behind and move forward?
All these are critical questions to ask yourself before deciding to get back because, if not addressed, the same issues will crop up again in the future.
How To Make Your Ex-Boyfriend Want You Back
Let’s now look at some practical ways to make your ex-boyfriend want you back.
#1. Be A Bigger Challenge
People love challenges, and they generally tend to appreciate the value of things more if they have to work hard to get it. Things are not very different when it comes to relationships.
As much as possible, maintain your distance, let him know that you’re doing well without him, and make him chase you. It’s best if you can actually manage to do this effortlessly. But if you find it hard, simply try to fake it till you make it.
Appearing strong, confident, and happy can make you irresistibly attractive to him. Also, try to limit your access to him, and let him assume that you’re doing completely fine without him. This can make him want you back desperately.
Think of the things that made your ex-boyfriend fall for you in the first place. Work on those qualities even more.
#2. Be Less Available for Your Ex-Boyfriend
After a breakup, it’s natural to feel an overwhelming desire to reach out and contact your ex-boyfriend. Although you need to put some effort if you wish to get back together, you must never appear desperate (even if you secretly are).
Give him some space. Take charge of the situation, and don’t let your emotions get the better of you. Be there for him when he genuinely needs your help. But also refrain from being overtly romantic at every possible chance. Don’t let him take you for granted by always being available for him.
#3. Make Him Jealous
Hang around with your other friends, male and female, and try to live your life normally. You don’t have to date other guys or sleep with them to make your ex jealous. Just pretend that nothing is missing from your life and that the breakup has made you stronger than before.
You can also use your social media to show that you’re doing great. Be careful to not overdo things though as people can see through pretense, especially if you’ve not been a social media person before. Just make sure to show him that your life doesn’t only revolve around him.
#4. Don’t Call Your Ex-Boyfriend
Even if it’s the only thing you seem to want to do these days, refrain from it. It’s best if your ex-boyfriend calls you first, but if he doesn’t, don’t keep calling him incessantly. Don’t completely cut off all communication between the two of you but wait for at least a month after your breakup to initiate the call.
The time apart can make you reflect on your past with a clear head; it can also make him wonder what’s going on in your life. After a month, when you do call, behave normally with him, just like a friend would.
#5. Change Your Look to Make Him Want You
As much as we don’t want your looks to be the sole reason for him to want you back, a little glamor wouldn’t hurt. Change your look in whatever way you feel like — maybe a new haircut or that hair color you always wanted. Keep yourself fit.
The best thing would be to work on yourself for your sake. When you do this, the natural glow on your face can make you all the more attractive without putting on any fake facade.
#6. Ignore Your Ex-Boyfriend and He Will Want You Back
Nothing hurts a male ego like ignorance and indifference. When you stop contacting your ex-boyfriend regularly, it can make him more interested in knowing what’s going on in your life.
Ignore him for a while and try to pretend that you’ve accepted the situation and moved on. This can induce a fear of loss in him and make him realize just how much he wants you back.
#7. Don’t Put Too Much Pressure on Yourself
Everything said and done, it doesn’t do to stress too much and put your mental health at stake. If your ex-boyfriend still has feelings for you, one of the above methods is bound to grab his attention. Be patient.
But there’s a chance that he may have moved on and is no longer harboring any feelings for you. Know when to stop.
Forcibly getting back together is never a good idea as it can once again lead to the same outcome. Just live your own life while trying to win him back and always be prepared for the worst.
#8. Keeping Him This Time
Once you get back, make sure to never repeat your previous mistakes. Resist the urge to fight over petty things and never bring up your past in a fight. Whenever you sense your arguments spiraling out of control, make an effort to calm things down. This time, when you start over, do it with more foresight.
A Few Parting Words
Those were some tips on “how to make your ex-boyfriend want you back”. Getting back together after a breakup can be difficult. However, rushing into things without thinking them through is never advised.
Give each other time and space to sort each other out and be patient. And know when to stop if you sense your persistent efforts are not working on him. But if you do manage to get back together, work on your mistakes, and this time, develop better communication.